Ten Reasons to Own Your Own "Monolith"
1) If you focus on your Monolith for 60 seconds you will feel twice as smart as you did yesterday.
2) If you are brave enough you can light your "Victory Cigar" with a space lazer*
3) You can Travel between the 3rd & 4th Dimensions if you slam on the anti-gravity brakes.
4) It can alert you about incoming Asteroids & yes you can pick up Netflix Free!
5) It will help you navigate the upcoming "Paradigm Shift". A big change is coming.
6) It will help you adjust to the "Pecking Order Blues"if the Aliens start telling Homo Sapian Jokes
7) Should you buy a Robot to clean your house and after two weeks she tells you she wants to see other people. That's just not right.
8) You can get a 50% discount on "The Panacea Pill" which can fix pretty much everything*
9) If you lose your job to an "Undocumented Alien" you get a free Scholarship to Obedience School... Go Fetch!
10) If you position it properly on your front lawn It will keep the neighbors off your grass.
Available Exclusively from
The Saint Lawrence Agency
319 Hermits Trail
Altamonte Springs, FL 32701
IncludesYour Engraved Monolith's Name,
Certificate of Ownership
& Free USA Shipping
Please allow 2 to 3 weeks for delivery
Any Questions firstname.lastname@example.org or
Now You Can Name "Your Monolith" up to 12 letters & numbers When you ordering with Paypal
In 1968 "2001 A Space Odessy" hit the silver screens and introduced us to a "Monolith" that helped teach the Apes to make Fire & Evolution was on its way.
In 2021 the Monolith's are back and you can own your own
"Where Will Your Monolith Land"?
Your Monolith's Name: